Remember that silence can never be a solution to the silent treatment. You actively choose not to respond to any comments, discussions, or accusations. People who haven’t been taught to care effectively for others in a household will use the … Even if you fail to respond during an absent silent treatment and we are engaged with other sources, we will be wondering why you are not responding. The selfish. I have a lot to learn and appreciate your responses to these real-life examples. The silent treatment is not useful, and serves as a barrier to effective communication. But if giving the silent treatment has become a habit for your partner, then you should refuse to become the victim. As the only option, the victim should walk out of the relationship or take some measures which can break the narcissistic silent treatment. This is not a discard, hence there is no deletion of you from our minds, but rather the need to be considering what you are doing for the purposes of both fuel and control. The silent treatment is the refusal to engage in verbal communication with someone, often as a response to conflict in a relationship. If self-improvement fails, see a professional therapist, because the silent … Make sure they are actually stonewalling (giving you the silent treatment) Decide in your mind when you wish to re-engage — 12 hours, 2 days, 1 week, 10 … In the first place, you are not required to play into the mal-adaptive behaviors of any person with a personality disorder. It’s designed to infuriate you, create panic and worry, make you question everything you said before the episode happened. Call them out on it instead of taking it quietly. The receiving end of the silent treatment isn’t easy either. Or you might tell her she has to stay in her room until she's ready to talk. Take a deep breath, clear your mind, and talk in a private place. Stay safe during this difficult time. Avoid letting the silent treatment get the better of you. The narcissist is keenly … If your partner continues to give you the silent treatment time after time, help him work on redirecting the habit that has developed in his life. Always approach them directly but in a calm and gentle manner. Make sure they are comfortable. Reply. It’s that simple. One way to cope with silent treatment abuse … If you’re the lonely spouse, suffering in silence, there is hope. For the one giving the silent treatment, it’s like drinking rat poison and expecting the other person to die. If this is just the first time that your partner is giving you a silent treatment, be calm and kind instead of reacting negatively. Also referred to as giving the cold shoulder or stonewalling, its use is a passive-aggressive form of control and can, in many circumstances, be considered a … How can you cope with and respond to the silent treatment? Therea says: The best response to the Narcissist Silent Treatment game is to move forward with your common sense leading the way. The best thing to do is to remain calm and take a step back. “Using logic is key. The silent treatment in a relationship is a form of emotional abuse. hand in hand with stonewalling – another destructive communication tactic that involves ignoring another person Understand What the Silent Treatment Is To one partner, the silent treatment is their way of dealing with an argument, but to the other, it’s a sign of shutting down. Communication is a two-way street that requires talking and listening. Don’t assume you know the reason for the silent treatment. Ask yourself honest questions of what’s going on and you will slowly recognize the situation for what it is. In most cases, the approach is to use a counter-silent treatment, and the marriage ends up without communication and trust. Opening Communication Stay calm. Don't talk to the person. Read Why The Silent Treatment Never Works And 6 Ways To Communicate Better This passive-aggressive behaviour is usually a repetitive form of emotional abuse which the narcissist will practice time and time again with each episode of silence often lasting a little longer than the one before. For example, you might make her hand over her phone until she ends the silent treatment. The causes can be complex and varied. need to take care of yourself so their behavior doesn't leave you feeling humiliated and rejected 1. The silent treatment is a passive aggressive manipulation tactic, but passive aggressive is still aggressive. Since the silent treatment is already imposed, it is unlikely that the victim will be able to convince the narcissist to opt for therapy or at least a consultation with a psychiatrist. Don’t fall for their ‘horrible childhood’ or ‘family of origin wounding’ tales. Schneider, Cikanavicius, and Health Writer Ann Pietrangelo all share keys ways to respond to a situation where a person thinks they are controlling you with the silent treatment: Ignore it until it’s blown … When your significant other refuses to speak to you or even acknowledge you, it’s not only infuriating but might also affect your bond. https://www.joinonelove.org/learn/how-to-deal-with-the-silent-treatment How to respond to the silent treatment It’s necessary to change your direction and start taking small steps in the right direction again. How To Respond To The Silent Treatment? Instead, appear (and truly feel, if possible) relaxed and positive. Give Your Child an Incentive to Talk One way you can encourage your child to open up faster is by taking away electronics or another privilege until she talks to you. 6 thoughts on “ How to Respond to the Silent Treatment ” Leisha says: May 13, 2020 at 11:34 am Fantastic article, as always. Here’s some things to understand and to do to encourage communication again: 1. It is hard to figure out how to respond to the silent treatment in this case. While it’s … One sniff of blood in the form of any weak or emotional response to the silent treatment and the narcissist will go for the kill. When a person resorts to the silent treatment, the recipient must try to understand the reason behind it. In a relationship fueled with games, learning how to respond to the silent treatment coming your way will give you back your power. Basically, you don't say anything, not even if the person tries to engage you in conversation. Change the negative pattern. Les Carter, Ph.D. If you try to meet the silent treatment head-on with aggression, you run the risk of things potentially becoming physically aggressive, which could terminate the relationship. Managing it then becomes easy. There is no need to waste emotional energy fretting over their moods. Be ready to listen, not just talk. The habitually silent spouse isolates the other, who becomes the lonely spouse. And if the narcissist cannot respond with common sense, keep moving. The term “silent treatment,” chillingly, comes from 19th-century prison reform.Instead of physical punishment or grueling work, which was believed to do nothing to truly alter the character of the criminal, prisoners would no longer be allowed to speak to each other and rarely be spoken to. Wait until he begins speaking to you again, and then address the issue. However, to your spouse, silent treatment in marriage is depressing and a deliberate attempt to cause psychological and emotional harm. Psychologist Shefali Batra perfectly sums up ways to respond to the silent treatment, “Silent treatment can be dealt with by first understanding the psychology and dynamics behind it. Seek out a professional. They are playing a game with you and trying to manipulate you. Your first reaction may be frustration, anger, or upset. The primary characteristic of the silent treatment is not talking to the person. Voice your feelings and thoughts: Make sure that your partner knows that the way they are behaving is … In summary, silence is a particularly painful weapon and has no place in a healthy relationship.
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